After 5 years of working in a job which I enjoyed but didn't see a future in, and being in a place I didn't feel like quite fitted where I want to be, or who I want to be, I worked my last day there. Of course, I was quite overwhelmed by a lot of emotions. I felt sad to be saying goodbye, yet relieved and excited for a new chapter, and mostly anxious because I don't know what that new chapter is.  Being the 'a little to chilled out when I shouldn't be' person that I am, although I've known for a while my last day of work was fast approaching, and I'  still yet to figure out what I'm doing next. I know I am not going to settle, but for now, I think there is going to be a lot of job applications and uncertainty. 

Nonetheless, the new start was needed. Being 24, it's time I figure things out some more careerwise, and personally too. I feel this new start is my chance to be the person I hope to be (at some point in the future, I've got a while to go, sat in my pj's, unemployed and snacking on chocolate, I'm not quite at the stage yet!)


When figuring out why I'm doing this when I have a job I'm perfectly comfortable with and an okay life, this quote came to mind:


So, I guess this is me starting again, in the attempt to live a life I'm proud of.
So it's time to be proactive. As the old saying goes, Rome wasn't built in a day, so I've got a lot of changes to make, endless hours of job applications, and I expect many unsuccessful interviews.

Outside of work, there are changes to come to. I'm going to start with a clearout, a clear space and a clear mind and all that jazz.

I'm also going to finally try to get a grip on the regular blog post and video uploading. 
During September there will be a new post on my blog each day at 4pm, besides Sunday where I will be uploading weekly to my Youtube channel which will go live at 7pm.

Once I have consumed all of the endless amounts of chocolate I have recently been gifted, I'm going to try to be more aware of what I am eating. Not dieting, just making healthier choices to feel better.
I'm also going to start running regularly, and when I do find my new job, join a gym, in hope that one day I'll feel strong and fit.

Of course, it's important I keep my creative juices flowing, so I am going to try to paint, and draw again, a forgotten love of mine. I also want to keep up writing poetry, maybe I'll share some of my poorly written words I've put together for my own form of therapy. I want to photograph more. I want to get into film photography and learn more about cameras.

When a job does come by, I plan to take acting classes, despite a pretty intense fear of public speaking, I'm had an undying curiosity for acting since I was a young child. I also want to take up life drawing classes. We did life drawing classes as part of our uni course every week, and it's definitely something I miss.

I want to get out of the house more. So often I find myself locked up in my tiny bedroom, and it's not always good for my mental state, so whether I go out for a walk, take my blogging to a cafe or my reading to the park, I think it would be good to spend less time sat on this uncomfortable bed, alone in a stuffy bedroom.

I have a more open mind to moving, so maybe that will be on the cards in the future. But alongside finding a job that fits, there are so much little, and big changes I'm going to make for my new start. 

With all of this in mind, and a blurry picture of where I want to be, I feel ready to start again in order live a life I'm proud of, and become someone I am proud of.

I don't know what's to come, but I feel I'm taking steps in the right direction, and I'm excited.